Some days I just get out of bed the wrong way, and the world seems somehow perfectly shaped into awkward pointy bits that seem intent on repeatedly poking me in the eyes. That was a metaphor, by the way - people haven't actually been poking me in the eyes mum, don't worry. It's at this point though that I do all I can to remind myself that things really could be worse. And of course, it could be so much worse - because I could be that guy. I could be trapped in an inexplicable rage, wanting nothing more than an endless corridor of swinging doors to blast through, with backing music by Nick Cave. But i'm not that guy.
One day though, it really could all go to shit. It could all go totally wrong - big time. One day I might just give up, and retire to a simple life of hiding under duvets and growling at passers by, cautiously venturing out of my quilted fortress to hunt for videogames and biscuits; crying myself to sleep amidst a sea of crumbs. This could happen. But I will never be that guy. That guy has to be that guy for the rest of his life. I couldn't live with that. Could you?
I'm thinking of getting it framed and keeping a copy on my desk, just to help stop me from slipping into a black hole of self indulgent misery. In the meantime, I've just bought myself eight luxury chocolate croissants, which should hopefully make a dent in this wall of Tuesday meh.Wish me luck.
The pain and despair in his eyes... oh gods, it's too heart-breaking to bear!
ReplyDeleteNever go there. I don't care how many luxury chocolate croissants it takes.
What game are they playing? 'How To Do An Amusing Fart'? 'Wii Ponce'? 'Dildo Insertion Trainer'?
ReplyDelete'Just Dance' - Massive hit in the UK, basically does what it says on the tin, except you're holding a wiimote.
ReplyDelete