Day 18: MY SEX IS SO AMAZING

Last week I tweeted in despair of the fact that all urban R&B songs sound utterly identical, and that I seem to be spending a seriously unhealthy quantity of my life listening to it in the office. For the record I don't regard myself as being a music snob, and I'm sure I'd find the genre much more enjoyable if listening to it didn't make me lose all respect for myself as a human being.

Upon mentioning the phrase R&B of course, I instantly recieved this incredible piece of targetted advertising, recommending that I check out some hot Toronto R&B by Show Stevens. A message I recieved from a man called Show Stevens. If you want to check out the song, you can download it from here.

My initial reaction was that I should just tell this guy to fuck off. Then I had a much better idea: I'd tell him to fuck off, then I'd give the guy the publicity he's been gunning for by reviewing his latest track: "So Amazing"; a song which tells a tale of a man who's going to have sex with a woman, and that's a really good thing for the woman, because this guy's sex is so amazing that it'll make her go crazy, because his sex is so amazing.

That's just my interpretation of the lyrics of course, but you should feel free to divine your own from the opening lyrics:

Oh. Oh (yeah baby).
We gone do it like this, girl.
I'm a touch your body like this, girl.
We gone have sex like this, girl.
My sex is so amazing; make you go crazy (go crazy).

Then of course I realised that someone like me reviewing the track wouldn't really be objectively sound, so with this in mind I decided that someone else should review the track:

I think it's important that they also get to see the fruits of their efforts - so please, post the below message into Twitter so we can see what Mr. Show Stevens thinks of this video review of his song.

Awesome video review of Toronto R&B legend #ShowStevens latest track check it out: http://tinyurl.com/ycxsohc

I've specially used a different Youtube account that doesn't have my face all over it to see just how far we can take the joke, so please don't mention me and @ShowStevens in the same tweet. Also, if you could take a moment to post a faux-genuine comment on the video itself, that would be brilliant. There's literally no reason for any of this other than the joy of senselessly confusing the shit out of a total stranger.

EDIT: Fuck fuck fuck. Three days of preparation, and it's all gone pear shaped - it seems that @ShowStevens has been banned from Twitter for spamming, throwing a serious wrench into the works of my master plan.

CHANGE OF PLAN: I've got his fucking email address. Please Tweet the above message and rate the video - once we've got enough buzz going on, I'll contact him directly. Keep an eye on the blog over the next week for an update!

Personally I like to think of this as an elaborate experiment driven by a cheeky sense of spam justice. My girlfriend thinks I'm just somewhat dangerously baiting a large black guy from Canada.

But fuck it, let's see what happens - chances are it'll be funny. Hell, he might even want to meet up in London to hang out with my crew. Failing that, can you think of a more amusing way to be brutally killed by a gang? No matter how fond of me you may be, you have to admit - you'd find it difficult to not have a cheeky grin at the funeral.

Remember to keep sending pictures of men wearing dresses to Masante86@gmail.com in order to be in with a chance of being the 'leading lady' for the official video for 'So Amazing', and encourage everyone you know to pass on the video review.