Day 43: MY SEX IS SO AMAZING (PART 2)

Click here to see part one.

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From: Davey C pimpin4guns@hotmail.co.uk

Date: Tue, 2 Feb 2010 21:49:41 +0000

To: masante86@gmail.com

Subject: Word up Show!

Hey man whas happenin? Blood where you gon on dat Twitter shit - was tryin find u but u gone man!!

My man DJ JamJahz made dis well bizting vid of yo new track "So AMazing" and peeps were chattin 2u bout it on twitter but you be gone, man...

ANyway\z check out the vid let me know what ya feelin. Sound is whack but dat shit aint how we roll ye fuck that geek shit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNNEd7CFXpI&feature=player_embedded

U still lookin 4 yo leadin lady? Blood u shud check out ma sister she is well bangin-fit for reeal.

Massive respect love yo work keep it real 4 real.

DAVE-E C LONDON CREWE (Massive UK england 4real)

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From:	masante86@gmail.com
Sent:	02 February 2010 21:51:25
To:	Davey C (pimpin4guns@hotmail.co.uk)

Hey send some pics of her bruv.

Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

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From:	Davey C (pimpin4guns@hotmail.co.uk)
Sent:	10 February 2010 12:24:41
To:	masante86@gmail.com

Yo word up word up Sorry for the slownees on this bruv - i got some snaps and that but want to realtalk that shit with my sisters boyfriend - hes my main man y'no so I want 2 to try get somehin a little drrrrty 4 u to give ya a FULL idea of what we're chattin bout here for real. I aint sayin I would cos she's my sister and yeah but hell man that shit is off the hook!!

Yo yo my main man JamJah wants 2 kno what you think of da video review I sent ya - he works in TV over here in da UK and wnts 2 know if he can get an early copy of yr album for a project he's workin' on - could get your ass involved in some of that BROAAAD-CAST shit you hear?

Let me know bruv could be slick - will get my sis's man to get snappin on that dirty shit.

Peace out show (real talk).

DAVE-EC LONDON CREWE

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From:	Michael Asante (masante86@gmail.com)
Sent:	10 February 2010 15:29:57
To:	Davey C (pimpin4guns@hotmail.co.uk)

Davey,

No worries bruv. I aprpeciate the word you are putting out there for me.

It is much appreciated! We would love to get down with your team and make things happen in the UK. I took a look at the video and I love it.

Give me your infor and I'll give you a call bruv.

Phone #

BlackBerry PIN#

Anything you can give me. We are moving quick with things right now and me and my team are ready to blow.

Get back to me as soon as you can.

Appreciate the lvoe and the feedback brother.

Much love.

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From:	Davey C (pimpin4guns@hotmail.co.uk)
Sent:	11 February 2010 22:19:31
To:	masante86@gmail.com
	1 attachment LEGGGS BI...jpg (25.1 KB)

For real bruv - I need to speak to my man JamJahh and 2 get 4 his details and shit 4u so we can HOOK THAT SHIT UP.

HE works on this TV channel called Ideal World and if he can sort it we could be able to get your CD shown on that shit 4real. Need JamJah 2 sort shit out first though man and U might need 2 send some pictures and shit - keepin it real 4 real but not too real coz his boss Ethel aint usual featurin this kind of wicked shit on the show, but 4 U Show we can WORK THAT SHIT OUT cos we got to make Ideal World THE IDEAL WORLD, you feel?

But wait up hold up my little sisters man came up good and I got U a good shot of that ass man - let me know if you into that shit, bruv I know she's my sister and I AINT SAYIN I WOULD, but you KNOW I been thinkin about that shit A LOT.

Gon' speak to JamJah bruv will try 2 hook u up with a number

DAVE-E C (Massive 4Real London)

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Day 36: Bad Day

Some days I just get out of bed the wrong way, and the world seems somehow perfectly shaped into awkward pointy bits that seem intent on repeatedly poking me in the eyes. That was a metaphor, by the way - people haven't actually been poking me in the eyes mum, don't worry. It's at this point though that I do all I can to remind myself that things really could be worse. And of course, it could be so much worse - because I could be that guy. I could be trapped in an inexplicable rage, wanting nothing more than an endless corridor of swinging doors to blast through, with backing music by Nick Cave. But i'm not that guy.

One day though, it really could all go to shit. It could all go totally wrong - big time. One day I might just give up, and retire to a simple life of hiding under duvets and growling at passers by, cautiously venturing out of my quilted fortress to hunt for videogames and biscuits; crying myself to sleep amidst a sea of crumbs. This could happen. But I will never be that guy. That guy has to be that guy for the rest of his life. I couldn't live with that. Could you?

I'm thinking of getting it framed and keeping a copy on my desk, just to help stop me from slipping into a black hole of self indulgent misery. In the meantime, I've just bought myself eight luxury chocolate croissants, which should hopefully make a dent in this wall of Tuesday meh.

Wish me luck.

Day 29: Facebook Phantoms

Yesterday Facebook informed me that someone had commented on my status update - when I followed the link however, they hadn't.

But of course, they did. These phantom messages usually appear from people you don't know all that well - strangers from the past who leave a comment, but then retract the decision immediately afterwards - most likely because it was over familiar, or excessively narky (two assumptions based on personal experience).

It's a shame, because I often think these messages would be the most interesting of all - what was so bad about it that you decided to delete it afterwards? Could it really be that fruity?

Regardless, whenever someone does it to me I always do it back to them immediately- just to freak em out a bit - make them think that I must have seen what they wrote, and responded by commenting on their status, before then also removing my response because they'd deleted the original message.

Alternatively, I've devised another brilliantly sadistic game you can all play - just start commenting and deleting all over the place. People will keep clicking to see what you've said, but it'll always be gone by the time they get there.

Obviously when you get people posting stuff like: "Do I look fat in this dress?" you've hit a fucking goldmine.

Go on, have a bash. If you're ever confronted, blame the internet.