Hello chaps!
I've moved - but don't worry, you can find all the old stuff and some new tosh too by dashing over to http://jamsponge.tumblr.com/
It's new, it's sexy, and it's purple. Good times.
Saturday, 20 February 2010
Day 46: Pizza Update
I was going to tell you all about the amazing pizza delivery takeaway just around the corner from my house, but I lack the focus to explain all the reasons why it's incredible.
I was going to take a photo of the delicious looking pizza I'd bought, but I forgot - and have eaten it all.
I was going to describe the toppings laid on the crispy base, but I can't remember what they were. My mouth feels like it's been attacked by chilli. Perhaps kidney beans were involved.
But i'm drunk, and I can't recall or manage to pull together any of the above.
Soon i'll explain all. My new plan - a blog philosophy to see me through, and keep this alive. But today, I'm drunk. I've no regrets - I left the office at 9pm, because I'm working on something that I think is fucking brilliant. I'll need your help on this too, so watch this space.
But good night - i'm off to watch Dexter and rub my stomach with glee.
I was going to take a photo of the delicious looking pizza I'd bought, but I forgot - and have eaten it all.
I was going to describe the toppings laid on the crispy base, but I can't remember what they were. My mouth feels like it's been attacked by chilli. Perhaps kidney beans were involved.
But i'm drunk, and I can't recall or manage to pull together any of the above.
Soon i'll explain all. My new plan - a blog philosophy to see me through, and keep this alive. But today, I'm drunk. I've no regrets - I left the office at 9pm, because I'm working on something that I think is fucking brilliant. I'll need your help on this too, so watch this space.
But good night - i'm off to watch Dexter and rub my stomach with glee.
Thursday, 18 February 2010
Day 45: Red Vs. Blue
It must have been about a year ago that I actively stopped giving a shit about UK politics.
Why? Because it's clear that no-one's interested in actually doing stuff that's good - the only important aspects of any new policy seem to be the following:
Politicians are always banging on about making a difference, but painfully it's utter rubbish. It's all just about scoring more points than the other side, which means that publicly accepting the fact that the other party are good at anything just isn't on the cards. To clearly highlight just how fucking mental this actually is, I've done a nice little diagram:
I mean, these are fundamentally people we're supposed to be placing trust in to make the right decisions for the entire country, and yet look at them in fucking parliament, booing and cheering like a Saturday night quiz show audience split down the middle into two opposed teams for no reason. Except on Ant and Dec's TwatChat Quiz Master Challenge the teams are asked to perform awkward Mexican waves, rather than EFFECTIVELY GOVERN THE COUNTRY.
To be honest, I find it difficult to even justify the point in voting. Lib Dem are clearly the lesser of three evils, and yet they've been out of power for so long they'd probably be so nervous that they'd probably end up bumbling around in a slapstick manner, knocking over the treasury with a ladder. Besides, they'll never fucking get in. Most people at this stage can't resist the smug insinuation that there are probably fucking millions of people JUST LIKE ME sitting on the fence who have been keeping the Yellows out of their rightful throne for years.
But of course, the only genuinely important reason I can see to vote is to try and minimise the number of seats the BNP win by proportion. A worthwhile reason enough, certainly - but you have to admit, it's pretty fucking rubbish.
Why? Because it's clear that no-one's interested in actually doing stuff that's good - the only important aspects of any new policy seem to be the following:
- It makes our party look good.
- It makes their party look bad.
- There is minimal risk that it can be twisted to make us look bad.
Politicians are always banging on about making a difference, but painfully it's utter rubbish. It's all just about scoring more points than the other side, which means that publicly accepting the fact that the other party are good at anything just isn't on the cards. To clearly highlight just how fucking mental this actually is, I've done a nice little diagram:
I mean, these are fundamentally people we're supposed to be placing trust in to make the right decisions for the entire country, and yet look at them in fucking parliament, booing and cheering like a Saturday night quiz show audience split down the middle into two opposed teams for no reason. Except on Ant and Dec's TwatChat Quiz Master Challenge the teams are asked to perform awkward Mexican waves, rather than EFFECTIVELY GOVERN THE COUNTRY.To be honest, I find it difficult to even justify the point in voting. Lib Dem are clearly the lesser of three evils, and yet they've been out of power for so long they'd probably be so nervous that they'd probably end up bumbling around in a slapstick manner, knocking over the treasury with a ladder. Besides, they'll never fucking get in. Most people at this stage can't resist the smug insinuation that there are probably fucking millions of people JUST LIKE ME sitting on the fence who have been keeping the Yellows out of their rightful throne for years.
But of course, the only genuinely important reason I can see to vote is to try and minimise the number of seats the BNP win by proportion. A worthwhile reason enough, certainly - but you have to admit, it's pretty fucking rubbish.
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